Ask the Expert

The Difference Between a Matron of Honor and a Maid of Honor Is…

Thanks to StarDust Celebrations’ co-founder and wedding planner, Marsha Ballard French, for answering this week’s reader question:

What is the difference between a Maid of Honor and a Matron of Honor?

“The Maid of Honor refers to a bride’s honor attendant who is NOT married. The Matron of Honor refers to one who is married. Honor attendants are usually a best friend or sister. Recently though, some brides have selected their mother for this role. It is perfectly fine to use the term ‘Honor Attendant’ and leave off the title of Maid or Matron if that works better for you. A couple of clever twists: If the bride choses a male friend as an honor attendant that person is referred to as a Man of Honor. If a groom chooses a female as an honor attendant, we usually refer to that person as a Best Woman.”

Kindly comment below.

Kim Bostic says:

January 8th, 2013 at 8:39pm

Does the Matron of honor have to be currently married or just has been married in the past?

Carolyn says:

December 28th, 2013 at 11:25pm

Can you have both maid and matron of honor??

jhingsan says:

January 8th, 2014 at 6:04am

but if the best man is already married? any other names? thanks!

Lori says:

May 29th, 2014 at 12:28am

What if I don’t have a bridal party, and the person I want for my MOH is married, do I call her my matron of honor even if she’s the only one?

Maureen says:

June 25th, 2014 at 4:09pm

What if she is divorced, would I say Maid or Matron?

Nicole Brown says:

July 12th, 2014 at 6:37pm

Is it appropriate to have 2 Maid of Honors?

Erika says:

July 13th, 2014 at 6:42pm

Who stands next to the bride? The maid or matron?

Lau says:

July 15th, 2014 at 9:36am

Hi, what if my MOH is divorced? Maid or matron of honour?

Lau says:

July 15th, 2014 at 9:38am

What is my MOH is divorced? Maid or matron of honour?

Name* says:

July 15th, 2014 at 9:11pm

What if maid of honor and matron are both married how do you choose?

Juvy says:

August 19th, 2014 at 8:47am

if i have maid of honor and matron, how about the best man?can i have 2 bestman also?

frank says:

August 27th, 2014 at 7:55pm

thanks…. for the clarification

Julie says:

September 16th, 2014 at 2:21pm

What if the Maid and Matron are Friends of the Bride (niether are blood related), I need to clarify how this will work to the Bride and Maid of Honor? I thought it would be the wedding party walk in, then the Matron of Honor and then the Maid of Honor followed by the Bride? Wouldn’t I the Matron of Honor hold the Maid of Honor and Brides Boquets while Vows are being said and Maid of Honor is adjusting the dress train and veils? Please help me clarify. I thought the Matron was kinda the back up to the Bride and the Maid of Honor? ….

Kiki says:

October 5th, 2014 at 10:19am

My best friend asked me to be the Best Woman at his wedding, but instead, we’re calling it Best Ma’am, lol. Thought I’d share that here.

Name* says:

October 14th, 2014 at 7:50pm

Who stands next you? how do you decide that, if you have more than one MOH and neither of them are family

hazel says:

October 15th, 2014 at 5:21am

if a friend is widowed, is she considered matron or maid of honor?

Brianna says:

October 25th, 2014 at 1:40am

I have a sister who will be 14 or 15 when we get married and she was upset she was not going to be my maid of honor. I told her I feel a maid of honor has a lot of duties to fulfill and needs to be someone who is older and more experienced. How do I honor her other than just making her a bridesmaid?

Kim says:

October 25th, 2014 at 9:18am

I want my cousin to be my Matron of honor but, she is a widow is that okay?? She has not remarried either.. What do you think??

Erin says:

November 16th, 2014 at 10:58pm

I agree. I need to know if you have a maid and a matron of honor… Both best friends not related, who stands next to you? I plan on having them split the duties of course but I don’t want anyone’s feelings hurt when we walk down the isle and who stands next to me?

Nicole says:

November 30th, 2014 at 10:49pm

Also have a question on how to honor you a younger sister who would not be able to fulfill the maid of honor duties, but still give her a title and make her feel included?!

chelsea says:

January 17th, 2015 at 4:53pm

I will be having a maid and matron in my wedding, my maid of honor is my sister, matron is my cousin, can I have my sister (maid) be 1 in the line up? Or do I absolutely have to have my cousin first!?

Amber the Awesome says:

January 28th, 2015 at 5:12am

@Ryan Conner: looks like someone’s getting a bit annoyed by the “would if they’re divorced or widowed or blah blah blah” questions. People really need to learn how to read other people’s questions & answers before asking the same stupid question over & over & over & over…. You’re doing a great job. Just smile while you’re answering the stupid questions. Trust me, it really will help you keep your cool & stay positive. God bless. 🙂

Leslie says:

February 10th, 2015 at 8:09pm

Ive read through the posts and never saw a clear answer so please forgive this being a repeat question.
If I have both a maid and matron of honor and neither one are related who would stand closest to me?

Thank you!

Name*Hannah says:

February 20th, 2015 at 3:51pm

If I have a maid of honor but I still want my male friend that I want to be in my bridal party would he be a bridesman or something?

Angel says:

February 24th, 2015 at 4:25am

Thanks for this info, this makes life easier. I get to honor my sister and my best friend win/win 🙂

kkkk says:

February 24th, 2015 at 10:10pm

I want to let everyone know! This was a great idea and solved my problems of who to choose to honor. I had 2 best friends and I asked one to be my maid of honor and the married one to be my matron of honor. I lost a best friend over this, because she felt having to share this role, no one could be honored by themselves, alone, to shine in that role. I want to advise everyone reading this to be careful, if you have a friend thats iffy or might be hurt by not being the main b*tch, try a different approach or you may lose a friendship. however, rightfully so, if you have a friend like this, they shouldn’t be honored to be in that position anyway. This is your day and you should have it how you want! If they don’t respect that.. stay strong and appreciate the other amazing people in your life.


March 4th, 2015 at 7:02am

My sister and best friend are both married I want my sister standing next to me coming out before me who would be the maid and matron if they are both married ?

Katie Canizaro says:

March 20th, 2015 at 8:42pm

Silly question maybe but I am my sisters maid of honor this coming October. I am also newly engaged to be married….Does this make me maid or matron of honor? Just curious

Danielle says:

April 4th, 2015 at 10:38am

If my 2 best friends are married, can I have 2 matrons of honor?

Taylor says:

April 6th, 2015 at 8:27pm

Hi I have a tricky one,

My one best friend is married so she would be called matron of honor.

My other best friend is getting married a month before me. Would I call her maid of honor?

Name* Dee says:

May 12th, 2015 at 9:18am

Enter your comment here…I have several dilemmas,#1. my daughter (age22) wants to be my maid of honor BUT I want her to sing as I walk down the aisle. #2. I have two really good friends that really don’t like each other, both are married and I want them both to be my matron of honor. #3. Then I have two sisters who say that they are ok with being bridesmaids but I think one wants to be my matron of honor. What’s a bride to do???? PLEASE HELP!!!

monique says:

June 8th, 2015 at 1:02pm

So my daughter would be my maid of honor but what would my best friend be considered seeing as though she has never been married?

Kayce says:

June 16th, 2015 at 5:57pm

What if the MOH is engaged? Do you list her as the Matron or Maid?

Madi says:

July 13th, 2015 at 11:59pm

how about if she has already a child? Shall I call her still maid because technically she is single? Or there is other name aside from maid and matron?

Kar says:

July 29th, 2015 at 9:55pm

My elder sister will have her wedding soon. My youngest sister will be her maid of honor; she’ll have two matrons of honor (me and our brother’s wife). Me, my husband and son will march together, while my brother, his wife and son will march together too.. Should she call us honor attendants? she’s having trouble in her invitation 🙂

Marie says:

September 14th, 2015 at 11:44pm

I will be the matron of honor in my best friend’s wedding next June and our other best friend (who is single) will be the maid of honor. My problem is about the weekend getaway bachelorette party. We all know the bride wants it to be in Vegas but honestly, I can’t afford it, i mean, being a wife and a mom I would rather spend all that money to good use like bills, etc. I told the maid of honor that we should talk to the bride and suggest a more affordable bachelorette party but she is insisting this is what the bride wants and is making me feel guilty for she kept reminding how important my role is. I am aware of that but i also feel like the bachelorette party that the bride wants is too demanding. And that its not fair to put this kind of financial burden on your bridal party. When I got married I didn’t let them spend for anything except for the dress. I made them take me anywhere for my bachelorette party cause I didn’t want them stressed out and I am by nature a flexible and easygoing person. So my question is am I being unreasonable and selfish? Should I talk to the bride about other suggestions for a bachelorette party? Thanks for any input!

Sarz says:

October 5th, 2015 at 12:43am

Enter your comment here… Is there an age restriction for your maid of honor? ??
What if she is 18, Is that ok???

Name*Steph says:

October 11th, 2015 at 8:00pm

What if I am having a Man of honor?

Lucille smith says:

December 11th, 2015 at 9:41pm

Can you have both a maid of honor and a matron of honor?

Marie-Elena says:

December 15th, 2015 at 12:33pm

Who’s side is the Matron of Honor usually from?

Name*Eneida Hernandez says:

December 29th, 2015 at 9:42am

My Question is can my Daughter be my Matron of Honor?

hs says:

January 5th, 2016 at 12:52pm

I will have my sister as MOH. But I also have 2 other cousins and a close friend whom are key people in my wedding and they are all married. I would like to honor them but I want my sister to have the higher title. Any suggestions? Thanks much!

Michelle says:

January 12th, 2016 at 11:11am

Hi! I’m having a really hard time. I have two sisters, 22, 24 by wedding, and 17, 19 by wedding, and my cousin I want in my wedding. I can’t pick between my sisters for a maid of honor, they both mean so much to me. But my cousin lives 6 hours away and couldn’t perform the duties by my side. I’m at a total loss as to what to do.

Katherine Jackson says:

January 19th, 2016 at 6:47am

If my best friend is not married, but has children and has been with the same partner for 13+years would her title be Maid or Matron?

Amanda says:

January 25th, 2016 at 6:22pm

I have a matron of honor (sister) and maid of honor (best friend). If the groom only has one best man how stands with him?

Erica says:

January 29th, 2016 at 11:27am

My best friend which will be my Maid of honor is getting married in March, my wedding is in September. Do I ask her by calling her Maid of Honor and then switch to Matron of Honor, or just stick to Maid or Matron the entire time. I will be officially asking her in February.

hs says:

January 30th, 2016 at 5:50am

I will have my sister as Matron Of Honor. But I also have 2 other cousins whom are key people in my wedding and they are all married. I would like to honor them but I want my sister to have the higher title. Any suggestions? Thanks much!

Tiffany says:

February 4th, 2016 at 2:58pm

Well I wanted my daughter to be my maid of honor since my son will be the best man and my cousin to be the Marton of honor but she isn’t married nor has been. I mean in reality does it really matter ?

hRl says:

February 11th, 2016 at 5:39pm

Can I have my (gay) brother as my man of honor and my married sister as the matron of honor? Would asking a friend to be my maid of honor along with them be too much?

jona says:

March 13th, 2016 at 8:31am

Do I have to have both maid of honor and matron of honor?

Kiundria Porter says:

April 28th, 2016 at 7:29pm

Do my matron of honor have to be married

Tamika Bassett says:

May 1st, 2016 at 8:23am

Hello, I’m a newly engaged woman and has never been married nor planned a wedding and neither have my fiancé. We’re planning for a end of July-August 2017 wedding. Where and what do we go or do first as for planning (websites, suggestions and how-to DVDs? Do I have to have a Matron of Honor? Can I only have my Maid of Honor ( my 21 yr old daughter ) who is doing all of the MOH duties stand next to me then the bridesmaids? And if so, who put together and pays for the bachelorette party? Please help

tawana says:

May 3rd, 2016 at 10:40am

I have a question. Im a lesbian &my partner were getting married this year in july..we both have a daughter one is 22& the other 31 neither are married but we want both of them in our wedding…Is it ok to have a matrion honer & a maid of honor

Tania says:

May 26th, 2016 at 9:28am

Hello! I have a best friend, who is also my daughters god mother, who I want as my maid of honor. She’s not married nor does she have any children. I have another best friend whom I want as my matron. She’s married and has kids. Now, my fiancé wants my matron’s husband as his best man now will I have my matron walk w/ the best man or will the maid be the one to walk w/ the best man. I’m confused on that. Please help. Lol thank you!

D says:

May 30th, 2016 at 1:17am

Is one title (maid or matron) more important than the other?

K says:

June 16th, 2016 at 9:53am

I have to best friends. One is engaged and is getting married they year after me, the other isn’t single. Can I call the single Maid and the one engaged, even though she is not married yet? i don’t want two people having the same title.

Cindy says:

July 3rd, 2016 at 1:12am

my sister is my matron of honor and I would like to include her husband / my brother in law as “escort” to the matron of honor. This is the same for my fiancés best man. He is married and we wish to include the best mans wife to the wedding party as best mans escort.
We don’t want to split up the couples. What name can we provide our inlaws?

vanessa says:

August 16th, 2016 at 2:02pm

I already have a maid of honor. I was going to ask another friend if she can be a matron of honor she is not married can she still be a matron of honor?

Betsy says:

August 21st, 2016 at 4:41pm

Hi! My sister is getting married Sept 10th this year. We are a very close family. She has 3 daughters one of whom elected herself as maid of honor. This is my sister’s 2nd wedding, . She’s having her daughters walk her down the isle. My sister has introduced me and refers to me as her maid of honor. Ive been fine with letting my niece hold the title and I’ll do the work but now she’s planning the maid of honor speech. Any ideas on how to find another title for me or her so feelings aren’t hurt. My sister said she can be the maid but I’m the matron, I’m single.

Evelyn says:

August 22nd, 2016 at 3:23pm

So I am asking for thoughts and advise on the fact that I am considering my best friend about all to be my MAN OF HONOR. Beside him, one of my female friends to be my maid of honor. (Honestly he will be directly beside me and she’ll be behind him.) And she can cover all the duties that he personally cannot fulfill because he is a straight male not allowed in my dressing room PERIOD haha

Mandy says:

August 25th, 2016 at 10:24am

I have both a Maid and Matron in my wedding. Do both give speeches at dinner?

Melesia Broom says:

January 15th, 2017 at 3:20am

I have 10 BM and he has 8 groomsmen because 2 dropped out. Instead of walking down as couples. I suggested that I let the to let them walk down individually. Girl boy girl boy so that it will not look uneven. It will be 9 on each side. Is that ok

Chloe says:

January 27th, 2017 at 6:50am

I would really like to have my cousin as my maid of honor but not sure if people will think it’s not right. My cousin means a lot to me and acted like my sister threw out my whole life so would it be a big deal

Katrice Wheeler says:

May 1st, 2017 at 10:45am

I decided to let my maid of honor wear a different dress from my matron of honor.

Wanda Palm says:

July 11th, 2017 at 1:01pm

Can a bride use both a maid of honor and a matron of honor?

Candice says:

July 31st, 2017 at 6:01pm

My sister don’t have a maid of honor is it ok to have a matron of honor at her wedding

Nika says:

August 12th, 2017 at 8:38am

1.Hi can I have bridesmaid’s that are married knowing maid= single and matron=married?
Would they be called brides matron? (I already have a matron of honor and I only want that one person for the role)
2.seeing that they would be walking with their husbands ,would their husbands still be called groomsmen

Natalie M says:

August 17th, 2017 at 6:42pm

My mum has asked me to be her maid of Honour. Im 22 years old, single and I’ll be 23 by the time she has her wedding. This is her second marriage however her first actual wedding . Is it weird for me to be her maid of honour? 🙂

Alma Nava Nieto says:

April 17th, 2018 at 3:25pm

I have 2 special ppl r they both considered equal or is one more honored then the other because I love them both and its important that when I ask them they know they mean the same to me special.

Melanie L Rigdon says:

May 17th, 2018 at 10:23pm

Would it be alright if I had my aunt as the matron of honor and my best friend as maid of honor?

Yes, absolutely!

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